http://graceamazed.tumblr.com
http://graceamazed.tumblr.com
http://graceamazed.tumblr.com
http://graceamazed.tumblr.com
http://graceamazed.tumblr.com
http://graceamazed.tumblr.com
Simplifying
I've been sorting through my room in preparation for moving. I've kept a lot of sentimental items but it's been freeing trying to decide what I can live without.
In light of starting things new, I made a tumblr account this morning. I haven't done anything to it yet so... more later.
Live simply. Live simply. Live simply.
In light of starting things new, I made a tumblr account this morning. I haven't done anything to it yet so... more later.
RIP Coach Wooden
"I have always tried to make it clear that basketball is not the ultimate. It is of small importance in comparison to the total life we live. There is only one kind of life that truly wins, and that is the one that places faith in the hands of the Savior."
Seven-point creed for life:
Be true to yourself.
Make each day your masterpiece.
Help others.
Drink deeply from good books, especially the Bible.
Make friendship a fine art.
Build a shelter against a rainy day.
Pray for guidance and give thanks for your blessings every day.
Growing Pains
I went through this period of feeling really inadequate and unsatisfied with myself for a lot of things. At first it was just for silly things like wishing I was better at photography or that I was smarter or more informed about things. Then it was wishing I was healthier and wishing I was a better daughter, a better friend, a better girlfriend, a better Christian. It was overwhelming and kind of depressing, actually. Then I realized, of course I'm inadequate. I'm only human. So I says to myself, stop whining you big baby! It just means I have room for improvement, right? It's all so time consuming though. Time exercising, time praying, time with people, time practicing hobbies... time reading the news, even. Maybe that's why I've been so upset that I don't have many plans this Memorial weekend. Time is too precious to waste. Anyways, two more weeks of school and then I'll have (almost) all the time in the world. Playtime, anyone?
Bold
I am not ashamed of the gospel, because it is the power of God for the salvation of everyone who believes
--Romans 1:16
Phobias
It took me a week to realize this, but I think I have a phobia that resurfaced from childhood. I jump into bed because I'm scared something underneath it is going to grab my ankles. Yeah, really. Haha. I tried googling to see if there's a name for it. Nope. But I found these:
Anuptaphobia - fear of staying single
Asymmetriphobia - fear of asymmetry
Cacophobia - fear of ugliness
Consecotaleophobia - fear of chopsticks
Doxophobia - fear of expressing opinions
Hexakosioihexekontahexaphobia - fear of the number 666
Ommetaphobia/Ommatophobia - fear of eyes (nooooo!!!!!)
Omphalophobia - fear of belly buttons
Paraskavedekatriaphobia - fear of friday the 13th
Peladophobia - fear of bald people
Phagophobia - fear of being eaten
Phronemophobia - fear of thinking
Anuptaphobia - fear of staying single
Asymmetriphobia - fear of asymmetry
Cacophobia - fear of ugliness
Consecotaleophobia - fear of chopsticks
Doxophobia - fear of expressing opinions
Hexakosioihexekontahexaphobia - fear of the number 666
Ommetaphobia/Ommatophobia - fear of eyes (nooooo!!!!!)
Omphalophobia - fear of belly buttons
Paraskavedekatriaphobia - fear of friday the 13th
Peladophobia - fear of bald people
Phagophobia - fear of being eaten
Phronemophobia - fear of thinking
10 things I hate about you
1. I think I'm allergic to being home. I'm always sick these days.
2. I have a special ring tone for my favorite non-family/boyfriend people. Hearing it is unfortunately surprising. And exciting.
3. Tuesdays and Sundays are my favorite days of the week.
4. I have a curious rash in the grooves between my pointer/middle and middle/ring fingers.
5. Future roomie and I decided on an apartment today.
6. Our oven is still broken. I really miss baking.
7. Life since college has been the most difficult stage of my life so far.
8. I still drag my rory blanket everywhere. Consequentially, it's 10x less soft than Paul's. Sadface.
9. I have the rest of my life planned out. Yup.
10. I'm going to blame lack of blogging and photographing/editing on lack of laptopping.
2. I have a special ring tone for my favorite non-family/boyfriend people. Hearing it is unfortunately surprising. And exciting.
3. Tuesdays and Sundays are my favorite days of the week.
4. I have a curious rash in the grooves between my pointer/middle and middle/ring fingers.
5. Future roomie and I decided on an apartment today.
6. Our oven is still broken. I really miss baking.
7. Life since college has been the most difficult stage of my life so far.
8. I still drag my rory blanket everywhere. Consequentially, it's 10x less soft than Paul's. Sadface.
9. I have the rest of my life planned out. Yup.
10. I'm going to blame lack of blogging and photographing/editing on lack of laptopping.
For love is from God
7Beloved, let us love one another, for love is from God; and everyone who loves is born of God and knows God. 8The one who does not love does not know God, for God is love. 9By this the love of God was manifested in us, that God has sent His only begotten Son into the world so that we might live through Him. 10In this is love, not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son to be the propitiation for our sins. 11Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another.
--1 John 4:7-11 (NASB)
sanctuary
I've always wanted a canopy over my bed.
I'm embarrassed to admit how surprisingly calming this sheer piece of fabric is over me. It's the one place in my bustling house where I can (almost) block everyone out. Yeah... I'm easily satisfied. I love my bed.
I'm embarrassed to admit how surprisingly calming this sheer piece of fabric is over me. It's the one place in my bustling house where I can (almost) block everyone out. Yeah... I'm easily satisfied. I love my bed.
Jamieboy, R.N.
My big brother James means the world to me. He's helped me get through so many hard times, so seeing him go through a hard time this past week was so, so painful for me. I sat in bed with him for an hour and he didn't say a single thing to me, no matter how much I tried getting him to talk. His girlfriend called me crying, worried and so lost at what to do. I really don't want to put all his business out in public, but there has just been a lot going on. I don't think my family has prayed so much or been so worried about anything. This morning I was woken up by phones ringing and my brother announcing he passed his NCLEX exam for nursing, so now all is perfectly well. Praise the Lord PRAISE THE LORD. He knows there's no way he could have done it without God's help and I'm certain God wanted him to know that. I guess we can all use a little humbling sometimes, hehe. Tears of joy this time. =)
Healer
You hold my every moment
You calm my raging seas
You walk with me through fire
And heal all my disease
I trust in you
I trust in you
I believe
You're my healer
I believe
You are all i need
I believe
You're my portion
I believe
You're more than enough for me
Jesus, you're all i need
Nothing is impossible for you
Nothing is impossible
Nothing is impossible for you
You hold my world in your hands
You calm my raging seas
You walk with me through fire
And heal all my disease
I trust in you
I trust in you
I believe
You're my healer
I believe
You are all i need
I believe
You're my portion
I believe
You're more than enough for me
Jesus, you're all i need
Nothing is impossible for you
Nothing is impossible
Nothing is impossible for you
You hold my world in your hands
blue
I'm the worst at dealing with negative feelings. I didn't get the "happiest" award at SAN for no reason. The past few weeks have been so terribly trying for me. I'm fine, really, but it's just so difficult sorting through and understanding any emotion besides happy, whether it's my own feelings or another's. So tiring. I'm exhausted. What's most exhausting is that when I start feeling down, I just close everyone out. Keep to myself, get lost in my thoughts. If you were to ask me what's wrong, it'd take me a few minutes to resurface and then another few to figure out how to explain myself. Ah, but God is good (all the time) and I have the most patient and understanding boyfriend in the world. It's exhausting trying to handle things on your own, for sure. So I guess this is me publicly blogging and breaking out of my I'm-feeling-blue-and-anti-social shell. I'll spare you the details though. But prayers would definitely be appreciated. Too many tears. Too, too many.
Anywho, I'm getting LASIK done next Friday. It's exciting =) My boss pulled some strings like crazy to let me get it done for free, saving me $4200 (!!!). His only request is that I name my first child after him. Yikes. I'm not too fond of the name Gerry. -_-
Anywho, I'm getting LASIK done next Friday. It's exciting =) My boss pulled some strings like crazy to let me get it done for free, saving me $4200 (!!!). His only request is that I name my first child after him. Yikes. I'm not too fond of the name Gerry. -_-
Re: Grace's Housing
Today I had a conversation with my boss about commuting versus living near campus for the next four years. It resulted in a letter to my father, which includes the following statements:
He said I better not show anyone, let alone my dad. I don't know, he has some good points. Besides, it has an official letterhead and a doctor's signature. Pretty legit, I say.
"Less driving means less pollution which means less ozone loss which means less global warming which means our human population will last on this earth longer. However, none of this matters if Jesus comes back sooner."
"...more time to study instead of spending the time commuting... However, she would probably actually spend more time online with things like Facebook so she really doesn't study that much more."
"...more friends. After class they can hang out at the nearest Starbucks or bar and drink to their hearts content... Of course, having more friends means she has less time to study..."
"Please consider $40,000 a small price to pay... After all, what is money? It is the root of all sorts of evil so you might as well give it away."
He said I better not show anyone, let alone my dad. I don't know, he has some good points. Besides, it has an official letterhead and a doctor's signature. Pretty legit, I say.
foresight
We regret to inform you that the members of the 2009-2010 Admissions Committee were unable to recommend you for admission to the University of California, Berkeley, School of Optometry in Fall 2010.
I have never read a single sentence more bittersweet than this. It's extremely relieving not having to rack my brain over another interview or having to decide between Berkeley and SCCO. My dad has some benefits from being in the navy, so my tuition would've been covered at Berkeley, saving me over a hundred grand in debt. Plus, I would've greatly appreciated the change of scenery, having been sheltered in SoCal my entire life. However! Almost everyone I know in the optometry field are SCCO alumni, so you can imagine the prodding I've been experiencing. One doctor threatened to retract his LOR when I mentioned considering Berkeley. A few people have half-jokingly said they were praying against me going to Berkeley so I could continue in ministry at my church. And my boss? The one who so perseveringly convinced me to consider optometry in the first place? I can't remember a single day at work in the past few months where he hasn't tried convincing me to attend his alma mater. Up until my acceptance into SCCO, he constantly reminded me that he was praying for me. And even though I've been anticipating news from Berkeley since then, he said, and I quote, "I stopped praying for you." Haha... sad.
It's a huge weight off my shoulders not having any of that pressure anymore. Part of me really wanted to go to Berkeley just because I knew everyone wanted me not to. The hardest part about being upset over this rejection was knowing that everyone I told would be happy about it. This morning I woke up really sad and I wanted to stay home from work and be mopey with the rain. Thank God I didn't though, since I have no reason to be mopey and all the reason to be thankful for my blessings. SCCO is an amazing school and, like everyone says, I'll be local for playtime. I promised I wouldn't be sad over this tomorrow, but I'm over it already. Besides, my boss gave me this ridiculous pink cream puff and a card from everyone at work today, congratulating me on getting into "the best optometry school ever!"
SCCO c/o 2014. BRING IT.
holmies
I'm pretty sure "guppies" isn't the game where you go to dark places, that cue pics aren't designed for ten people, that playground age restrictions will never be followed, and that the monopoly card game isn't really meant to harm friendships in any way (@paulhsu, I still can't believe how ridiculous you are, but I guess that's what it takes to be alpha male). I drove a hundred miles across seven different freeways today. Another (un)productive day off, I'd say. My biggest regret ever -- leaving my camera at home. asdf;lkj!!
"First, distract target. Then block his blind jab. Counter with cross to left cheek, then attempt wild haymaker, weaken right jaw. In summary, he's wringing, jaws fractured, three ribs cracked, four broken, diaphragm hemorrhaging, physical recovery in six weeks, full psychological recovery six months, capacity to spit at back of head, neutralized." --Sherlock Holmes
"First, distract target. Then block his blind jab. Counter with cross to left cheek, then attempt wild haymaker, weaken right jaw. In summary, he's wringing, jaws fractured, three ribs cracked, four broken, diaphragm hemorrhaging, physical recovery in six weeks, full psychological recovery six months, capacity to spit at back of head, neutralized." --Sherlock Holmes
flours
I spent Christmas weekend at this house my parents have far far away. Its lack of internet forced me to spend my time baking, knitting, baking, reading and more baking. Amazing how much more time there is in the day without internet! It took a few tries but I have to say, my last batch of cinnamon rolls was my best ever. Too bad someone put them in the fridge last night and they hardened on me. Sadface. My brother took some fun photographs of me and my baking mess, but I'm too lazy to scavenge for them. Maybe later. Anyways, it made me realize that another dream job of mine is baker. I have the biggest sweet tooth and terrible eating habits. It'll catch up to me soon. Real soon.
mum's the word
In elementary school when kids were brought to school by their parents, I used to think it was so cool when girls looked just like their moms. I don't know why. And I think I was disappointed that I didn't. I might look nothing like my mom, but lately I've been realizing how much I'm exactly like her. Let me describe her -- at church she's the happy, smiley one; she's somewhat of a perfectionist and is very specific about wanting things done a certain way; she hates being late; she always keeps herself busy & gets restless with idleness (except for watching movies); she likes when everyone is together; she loves shopping; she always makes to do lists; she loves listening to music; and what I've more recently realized -- she's very much the epitome of "wives, submit to your husbands."
I think I can say all of the above for myself. It's interesting. I wonder how much of it is me unconsciously picking these things up or if any part of it is at all hereditary (nature vs. nurture! heh, that's the Psychobio degree in me). I spent all Saturday morning baking pecan tarts with her and she reminded me how she wanted each step done, e.g. not wanting the pecans crushed too much or wanting the crusts to be perfectly even all around. I think that's why I have a hard time asking for help sometimes -- I like things done a certain way too, but I feel bad telling people what to do and end up doing everything myself.
Anyways, I really appreciate her these days. I used to resent her because she didn't like my first boyfriend and I was all bratty-teenager about it, but it's so fun now when she asks about Brian and tells me to invite him to things. It's fun even when she asks about old roommates and ohnine friends by name. I forget that I've been away for four years and this is us getting to know each other again, it seems like. It's fun. She's quite the silly person.
PS. Shoutout to Janelle, who has encouraged me to blog more candidly :) HI JANELLE.
I think I can say all of the above for myself. It's interesting. I wonder how much of it is me unconsciously picking these things up or if any part of it is at all hereditary (nature vs. nurture! heh, that's the Psychobio degree in me). I spent all Saturday morning baking pecan tarts with her and she reminded me how she wanted each step done, e.g. not wanting the pecans crushed too much or wanting the crusts to be perfectly even all around. I think that's why I have a hard time asking for help sometimes -- I like things done a certain way too, but I feel bad telling people what to do and end up doing everything myself.
Anyways, I really appreciate her these days. I used to resent her because she didn't like my first boyfriend and I was all bratty-teenager about it, but it's so fun now when she asks about Brian and tells me to invite him to things. It's fun even when she asks about old roommates and ohnine friends by name. I forget that I've been away for four years and this is us getting to know each other again, it seems like. It's fun. She's quite the silly person.
PS. Shoutout to Janelle, who has encouraged me to blog more candidly :) HI JANELLE.
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